A-"Muse"-ing Thoughts

Swine Flu

I saw this picture today and thought it was SO funny that I had to post it on my blog. (NOTE: No, I am NOT saying that the Swine Flu that is infecting people is funny, I am saying this picture and caption is funny)

List of Unusual Deaths

So I have to admit something.  I own most of the books in the series titled "The Darwin Awards", which is all about "individuals who ensure the long-term survival of our species by removing themselves from the gene pool in a sublimely idiotic fashion."  Basically it is about people who make very stupid decisions that end up causing their untimely death.  It always amazes me the decisions that people make in their life which can result in the end of their life.

Today I found on wikipedia the following list:  "The List of Unusual Deaths" which accounts the unusual deaths of people for centuries.  Many of these cannot be verified, but many others can.  Makes for some interesting reading - as well as some insights on things NOT to do if you want to live a long, happy life.  Strange, I know... but give it a try - you might find yourself even chuckling a little bit, as well as your jaw dropping, and also a bit of pity.

My Simpsons Character

Another fun one is found at simpsonizeme.com where you can upload your photograph and it will generate what your Simpson's character would look like.  Well, other than the end result being a bit too skinny (but it probably couldn't tell that from my head-shot picture only), here is what my Simpson's character would look like.

My Yearbook Pictures

Thanks to the wonderful feature at yearbookyourself.com, I thought I would share my yearbook pictures from over the years....  ENJOY.
1950

   
1952
 
1954

1956

1972

1974

1976

1978

1980

1982

1984

1986

1988

1990

1992


OK... here is the SCARY thing!!!  The 1990 picture looks almost 100% identical to my REAL Sr. Photo that I took in 1990 (for graduation in 1991).  YIKES!!!!   LOL

Jesus Junk of the Month Award

So I debated whether or not I should post this award now, since the item is not yet released... but I decided that it was so worthy of the Jesus Junk of the Month Award that I could not wait for months to share this gem with everyone.

So here you have it... Announcing... are you ready for this.....

Yes... your eyes are NOT deceiving you.... "SUNDAY SCHOOL MUSICAL"

But wait... it gets even better.  Look at this description for the movie....

"This original production currently being filmed in Los Angeles joins the library of successful family oriented musicals such as “Grease,” and the “High School Musical” films. The inspirational storyline centers around a group of teens who when faced with the news of their local church being torn down enter into a song and dance competition with the hopes of raising the money to save the building. "

Ummmm.... I don't know when the last time was that they REALLY watched or listened to the musical "Grease" - but that is not a musical that I would classify as a "family oriented musical".

So there you have it.  On Oct. 21st you can own this gem for only $19.95.  Don't let this pass you by as it is sure to be sung by all of your students for years to come.......ya... right!!!

Jesus Junk for May 2008

Well, it has been a LONG time since I have posted, and I have a few posts in the works.  But, I figured I would get back to blogging with this classic.

Believe it or not, I saw this on TV today as a regular commercial.  I can tell that I have moved into the Bible Belt when a commercial like this is on day-time TV.  I would have never seen something like this in Orange County, CA.

Anyway... here it is... your own personal, talking Jesus.  The commercial even says it will help you feel closer to your personal savior as He instructs you and you can hold him in your arms.  What are we doing to our Children? Well, I am glad that the Talking Jesus Doll comes dressed in authentic linen robes and traditional sandals.  I mean we wouldn't want our children thinking that Jesus walked around in VANS or something.

And, I am sure, if you buy this "religious treasure that recites bible versus aloud" your child will look just like this:

I don't know about you, but if you look closely at the boy in that picture, he looks more disturbed and disgusted than he does happy and comforted.

(also If you click on the link for the site above, you can actually watch the commercial as well)

A Favorite Holiday

Today is a favorite Holiday in the Nielsen household.  And it has been since I can remember as a child.  In fact, April Fools day is something we look forward to and often times scheme for weeks in advance what to do and how to get one another.  It has reached the point where most of our close friends, and our family, are so prepared for the day that you can't get one another.  For example, I tried to get my best friend Andrew today - and as soon as I started he said to me, "I have a calendar sitting in front of me Ryan and I know what day it is."  He also told me that on his calendar in his iphone he has "April Fools Day - don't believe anything Ryan tells you."  HeHeHe.  That's because he has been gotten in the past by me. 

Well, I tried to get a few people today.  Most of them failed because they have been well prepared.  But, I did get two people:  1) the financial secretary at work (yes, that can be dangerous because she controls my paycheck), and 2) my MOM!!!!  This one was a shocker, especially because she was expecting it all day long.  She told my dad and her co-workers that she was ready for whatever I would try and pull.  But, I was so convincing and believable and had the perfect set-up that I even got my mom.  She emailed me later and said, "you're good.  You win!!!"   

Anyway, as I was thinking about today another friend, Adam, reminded me of another GREAT nationwide April fools joke.

 

One of the biggest April Fool’s jokes of all time was brought to you by Taco Bell. In 1996, they ran the ad below in 6 major newspapers across the country announcing that they had purchased the Liberty Bell.

Taco Bell Buys The Liberty Bell
In an effort to help the national debt, Taco Bell is pleased to announce that we have agreed to purchase the Liberty Bell, one of our country’s most historic treasures.

It will now be called the ”Taco Liberty Bell” and will still be accessible to the American public for viewing. While some may find this controversial, we hope our move will prompt other corporations to take similar action to do their part to reduce the country’s debt.

What was so great about this prank is that it was almost believable. News of the sale spread all over, thousands of people were calling to complain, and no one put the whole thing together. By about noon, Taco Bell let the cat out of the bag… it was a prank. With that the media went nuts… they loved it, everyone loved it, and Taco Bell goes down as the king of the corporate prank. 

What Book Am I?

Well, I don't know that I fully agree with the results of this quiz, but fun to take anyway....

You're A Theory of Justice!
by John Rawls
In the beginning, you lived in a town. The town had many problems! Rather than moving, you decided to come up with the idea for the best town ever. Going all the way back to the original position, you created the idea for the best town ever! Lo and behold, the best town ever looked almost identical to the town you lived in. You decided to stay in the town. Now you resent people mistaking your refined thought experiments for "the wall of stupidity" in high school debate rounds.
Take the Book Quiz at the Blue Pyramid.

Speaking Leave

I am really excited about this upcoming weekend...

Last summer (2007) I was hired to be the speaker for a Jr. High summer camp in the Yosemite area in California.  I spent a lot of time working on a creative series for that week and ended up developing an series that I titled, "Lessons from Oz".  Every night of the week had a theme saying and I would show a clip from the movie, The Wizard of Oz, followed by a funny photoshopped picture of myself as one of the characters, and then my talk for the evening.  I not only loved doing it, but I had a great response from students and youth workers alike.  I had a ton of fun with it. 

Last July I blogged about the entire series as I gave my talks and also posted all of the individual photoshopped pictures.  Shortly after this I was contacted by Deneice asking me if I would come and do a shortened version of this series for the San Jose Presbytery Jr. High Winter Camp on March 7-9, 2008.  I was SO excited to be asked to do this, and readily accepted the invitation.  At that time, March 2008 seemed to be so far away... and now here we are!!! 

I cannot wait to go and do this series again.  I can't wait to hear the laughs.  I cannot wait to share about the Love of Jesus Christ. I cannot wait to share and speak and teach - something I love to do.

So on Friday morning I will be flying to California and will spend the weekend doing my "Lessons from Oz" series.  I don't know if I will have any internet access during the weekend, so I don't know if I will be able to blog while I am there.  If I can, I definitely will.

In the meantime, for anyone who missed it, here is the Poster that I created with each of the individual pictures I used from my summer series.  The students only got to see one of these pictures at a time - one each night. And this weekend the students will only get to see 4 of the 6.  For those who never saw this - enjoy.  For those who did - enjoy laughing all over again.

   

 

Good Quotes

stephen wright:

“Black holes are where God divided by zero.”

emo phillips:

“i wanted a bike, and asked god to give me one.  but then i realized god doesn’t work that way.
so i decided to steal a bike and ask god for forgiveness.  it worked.”

(HT to Marko)